These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
