Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
