You can't motorboat a personality
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize