i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize