You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
