I feel great
I just peed on a car
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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