I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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