Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
