I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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