I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
