The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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