Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
