I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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