her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
