im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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