Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
