I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
