i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
