Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
