Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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