You really coming over, don't trick.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
