Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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