And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Randomize