i think my mom watched the whole time
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
