playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
