I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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