why didn't you poke me back
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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