He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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