No, you can still breathe under the balls.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize
