my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Randomize
