you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize