a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
