their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Randomize
