I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
