No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Randomize
