I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
