Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
