I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
