New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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