Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
