Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
How does it feel to date your dad?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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