Already got asked if we're dating
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Randomize
