The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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