you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Randomize
