I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
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