Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
