That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
