babies were throwing up all over the place
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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