am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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