All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
