He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
