craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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